I am beginning to write this article at 5:58 PM on 12/31/2023. I have all intentions for it to be live on 1/1/24, but it remains to be seen whether I’ll hit that target. The fireworks from all the neighbors are already going off outside. Thankfully though, the New Year is always a low-key affair with my family. No big parties or events. No grandiose firework displays in the yard. Just cheese, crackers, dip, and some sparkling cider. And lots of reflection. And… boy oh boy… there’s a ton to reflect on from this past year.
Seems like every brand in the world is ripping Spotify off now and doing a Wrapped. (Honestly though, no one needs a Duolingo Wrapped or a Life360 Wrapped hahaha) I figured though, for posterity’s sake, I probably needed to do one for myself. After all, 2023 was an eventful year. I moved away from home, got my first apartment, and started my new job in January. I lost my papa in March. I had my heart broken in May. My pastor died in July. I finally clicked into a new Charleston church in August. I dug down and got serious about writing this blog in September. One of my work buddies died in December.
This year has been the hardest of my life yet. There’s been so much loss. So much anger. So many questions. But, through it all, God was faithful. I will never know why on this side of heaven He chose this to be the year to bring certain events to pass. While I’ve felt the barrage of loss this year, looking back now I can see the blessings that were showered down as well. My family grew closer to each other through the tragedy, rather than being ripped apart. Going through that pain allowed me, later on in the year, to lend a helping hand and sympathize in ways I couldn’t have before. My car never broke down. I was never without food or a warm place to sleep. I was able to buy my dream acoustic guitar. I didn’t lose any friends. The Lord blessed me in my new job, allowing me to excel in work relationships and job responsibilities. I was able to preach in Charleston. I was able to counsel. The Lord allowed me to build the reputation of “preacher” at the mill. I was even asked to lead the prayer for my entire team at the Christmas potluck! What an opportunity to witness!
This was a year of learning to rely on God in a way I hadn’t before. Was I perfect? No. Did I always maintain my ways before Him as I should have? No. Can I say that I’m closer now to God than I’ve ever been? No. I’ve taken a beating, and I honestly believe I fell off when I should have held tighter. But I can tell you with absolute certainty, going into 2024, that I’m going back to clinging to the Lord. It’s hurt, but He’s knocked some sense into me in 2023. There are certain things that I started out chasing this year that I’m not chasing anymore. Certain things were high on the priority list and now God has finally knocked them down a few rungs.
At the beginning of the year, I wanted money. I had dollar signs in my eyeballs. I worked like a dog, averaging 60-hour weeks. Uncle Sam loved me this year, I can assure you. The Lord has taught me that it isn’t worth it. Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for my job. I prayed for a job that would allow me to support a family on a single income. For the time, it seems like the Lord has afforded me that opportunity. However, I shouldn’t be working 60-hour weeks regularly. Cutting back is one of my New Year’s resolutions. I’ve learned that investing in a bank account isn’t nearly as valuable as investing in people. And Investing in people takes time. If I’m going to do that more in 2024 (and I’m praying that’s the case), then I’ll have to spend less time at the office. With the Lord’s help, I’m going to do just that.
At the beginning of the year, I wanted a girl. I craved that companionship. I still do. But it’s no longer the same. You see… when 2023 started I wanted a specific girl. And I wanted her because I wanted her. Now, through many tears and struggles, God has shown me that I need to want a woman because He wants me to have her. I need to wait until He brings her. Until He gives her to me, I need to pull back and invest the time I would spend growing that relationship with her growing it with Him instead. I don’t need to try to force the future I want into my present. You can’t fit a square peg into a round hole no matter how hard you try. It took me over a year to figure that out.
Two of my closest buddies have gotten engaged this year. How’d I stack up? Welp… this year I struck out on a girl I thought I was going to get down on one knee for someday. Man… it hurt like a roundhouse kick to the face. And, because of my dogged, persistent, stubborn determination, I kept after it when I should’ve dropped it. I didn’t mentally let go. I didn’t emotionally let go. It took months after the crash ‘n burn for me to just let go and let God. Praise the Lord though, I think I finally got it. Glory be to God that He doesn’t stop trying to get to us, even when we ignore what He’s putting right in front of our faces! I finally got the message, months after I probably should have. What’ve I learned? I learned that I’m done. Until the Lord makes it unavoidably obvious that she is the one, I’m sitting still and waiting. No more chasing and no more engineering. Next time, it’s going to be in His timing, not mine. It’s going to be in His way, not mine.
I’m getting back into the Word. I’ll be reading the Bible through again in 2024. I’ve done it twice, but it’s been years ago. Since I moved, I’ve done less and less Bible reading to accommodate my work schedule. That will be changing. If I’m going to be ready for the next step that the Lord wants me to take in 2024, then I have to be in communion and communication with Him in a way I haven’t been in a while. With the Lord’s help, I’m going to do just that.
I’m going to seek to get more involved in the new church I’m a part of. There are lots of opportunities to serve and be an encouragement. I see where the Lord could open some doors. Whether He will or not, that’s not up to me. As 2023 closes out, I’ve decided I’m tired of wishing I was in a different spot. It’s about time I lean into where the Lord has placed me, rather than shying away from it. It may not be everything I had drawn out and dreamed up in my head, but He knows better than me what I need to be doing. You know what they say… the Lord’s Will is just what you’d want for yourself if you knew the whole story. When He’s ready for me to move, He’ll make it known.
I’ve got some tinier things I want to knock out. I want to continue to write for this blog. I want to release five lo-fi albums on Spotify just to say I did it. (I’ve already got one in the pipeline 😉) I want to begin increasing the presence of Man of Might on other social media channels and drive traffic here. If the Lord blesses it, I want it to grow. If it doesn’t grow, at least it’ll be a place for me to catalog random things I learn about and write about. And, if the Lord decides to take me home in 2024, it’ll be my little digital memorial 😁. If He doesn’t, Lord-willing I’ll be making another one of these posts on 12/31/2024, and I’ll compare notes.
Keep up the fight brothers. Keep your eyes on the goal. The 2024 vision statement is become a man among them. As it progresses, I’ll continue to explore what that means in my life, and I hope that you will do the same in yours. Now… I need to go get some Rotel dip out that crockpot and drink me some sparkling cider.
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