One more rep. One more rep. This was the singular thought going through my mind as my extended arms held the barbell above my chest. It was only a 185 lbs bench press. I’d done it a couple of times already. For sure I could do it one more. Besides, I could feel my spotter’s eyes on me. “You’ve got more than that in you”, he laughs. There was no way I was going to wuss out.
Thumbs aligned. Shoulders inline. I began dropping the weight in a controlled motion towards my chest. The burn escalated. Just before the barbell touched my chest, I began my upward ascent, pushing it back towards that grimy ceiling tile above me, ready to get rid of the weight. My arms are shaking by this point. My progress slows. The barbell sits almost motionless in the air as I, red-faced and grunting, shake beneath it. My spotter comes in to assist me, but my pride just won’t have it. Before he can pull up on the weight, I lurch the last couple of inches, simultaneously pulling my arms back over my head to rack the weight on the metal hooks.
That over-exerted lurch pull causes my shoulder to explode in pain. I absorb the shock with another grunt as I spring off the benchpress bench, attempting to shake it off. It doesn’t go away. Being the absolute meathead that I am, I then switched to legs, proceeding with a different workout routine for the rest of the session. MY shoulder was DONE, and it hurt to even move my arm. But, still, no way I was going to wuss out in front of my gym buddies. On the drive home 30 minutes later, the pain became worse. As my arm stiffened, even hitting bumps in the road would send pain shooting through my shoulder. What in the world did you do Sam?
When I showered that night, I could barely get my arm above my head. As long as my left arm was stationary, the pain was bearable. Any movement inflamed it though. Did I tear my rotator cuff? Did I sprain my AC joint? I began falling down the WebMD rabbit hole as I ate my supper. Phrases like “6-month recovery”, “arm slings”, and “invasive surgery” kept popping up and I started getting more and more worried. Rather than continue to amp up my stress levels, I made up my mind to call the on-site clinic at work the next day to schedule an appointment and go to bed. I was too stubborn to take Advil, so I laid there with a throbbing shoulder, flat on my back because any other position hurt, until restless sleep finally overtook me.
I awoke the next morning to a stiff, still-hurting, left shoulder. I got ready one-armed, got my lunch and work backpack all packed, and then walked down a couple of flights of stairs to the parking lot. I dumped my bags in the back, scraped all the ice off of my car in the 30-degree weather… mostly with one arm, and finally sat myself down into the ice-cold driver seat to drive to work. Needless to say, I was ANYTHING but a happy camper by this point.
With the help of Advil, and as little movement as possible, I made it to my doctor’s appointment at 9 that morning. The good doctor explained to me I might have sprained my AC joint and that I needed to go get some X-rays done in Mt. Pleasant at my earliest convenience. After scheduling that online (then having to reschedule on the phone when that didn’t work) I secured an imaging appointment for that same day at 4:30 pm. All I had to do was leave work early and fight city traffic. I did so…earlier today. Now, I’m sitting here wishing I’d never touched that stupid barbell.
The Lord has watched out for me in a multitude of ways. The pain has abated throughout the day, so I think I will sleep better tonight. My job isn’t physically demanding, so I can still work. The clinic was on-site at work, so I didn’t have to make a trip to a public hospital. The imaging site in Mt. Pleasant was able to fit me in, even though I showed up late. Everything was covered, so not a penny came out of my pocket. I no longer think I have a “surgery-required” rotator cuff injury. Hoping it’s just a sprain that I’ll be over in a month or two. Still, why did I feel the need to take that last rep? All of this could have been avoided.
As I’ve tried to get in the habit of doing, I’m looking for what I need to learn from this. This verse keeps popping up in my head.
For bodily exercise profiteth little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come.
1 Timothy 4:8
It’s almost funny now that my big goal for 2024 was to get swole (as the kids say). It’s such a trope of a New Year’s resolution, but I fell right into it. Meal-prepped my chicken breasts and sweet potatoes for the week. Loaded up on my protein supplements and workout gear. I was READY. Then I screw my shoulder up in the second workout of the year and realize that I will be taking it easy for QUITE a little while. Not exactly how I had it planned.
Depending on how those X-rays come back, I could be on light duty with this shoulder for HALF A YEAR. And I have no one to blame but myself and my pride. But, that points me to a bigger picture I want to explore here. This is a prime example of the actions and consequences of an attitude that many of us carry daily.
We bite off more than we can chew. And, almost always, we take big ol’ bites of trash and then wonder why we keep on feeling awful. What do you mean Sam? I mean we put a lot of time and effort, often more than we should, in things that don’t matter. Thus, we inadvertently harm ourselves because our focus is turned away from the things that matter more. We fill up on junk food and don’t have any time for the meat and ‘taters of this life.
So, I ask the question of myself and you… do you want to be profitable in all things, or profitable in little? It is not uncommon for a man to want to go out and make the world his. He wants to grow in his career. He wants to make money. He wants to have nice toys, and nice house, and a beautiful woman by his side. I think plenty of men have what I’ve come to call James Bond Syndrome. They want to be classy, masculine, desirable, and resourceful. However, we go about achieving those things by putting in more hours at the office, prowling nightclubs looking for pretty girls in slinky dresses, or spending countless hours at the gym lifting and lowering pieces of steel. If you take a step back and open your eyes to the reality of the situation, it begins to look a lot more fruitless and pointless. It’s profitable in little because, at the end of the day, you will be left with things that don’t last.
As I learned in the case of Tony, the office will keep running just fine when you’re not there one day. He was an essential part of the team until he just… wasn’t. Someone stepped right in and took his place. That shows me that all that power and money you built up at your job won’t mean a hill of beans in the grand scheme of things.
Chasing those women won’t help you either. Those women running the streets at night, looking for a man to spoil them with drinks and attention, aren’t women who want to be helpmates and mothers. Sadly, many of them won’t realize the error of their ways until the day they start seeing wisps of gray in their hair and bags under their eyes. They won’t realize it until they are no longer desirable because the physicality they built their desirableness upon has faded with age and time. And, if that physical attraction is all you looked at them for, you will realize the same, and move on to the next girl, repeating and vicious and sinful cycle.
And, as I’ve learned these last few days. Maybe I’d be better served spending more time in God’s Word than in the gym. Yes, I will heal and eventually be able to go back. I probably will go back, as exercise is important for maintaining health. But, I will not make that desire for physical appearance and physical strength a god in my life. For, as I’m experiencing at this very moment, there will come a day when my tendons and joints and bones will ache and I will not be able to lift as much as I once did. If God allows me a long life, age will eventually take its toll. And, when that day comes, will there have been profit in spending all the years working on my physique at the expense of working on my relationship with the Lord?
No. So I’m choosing today to profit in much. Put first things first fellas. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it one thousand times. God first, wife second, kids third, then everything else in the world after. And that after includes that six pack 😉.
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